Information I Need

I'm not going to start bitching tonight, I'm just going to show my new vid which I feel is very fitting. And then, I might bitch about something else.

Did you know that word press was a fucking comedian? The other night I'm adding the new terms from last week to the original glossary that shows up there in that little window that conveniently says, "Rob Glossary". When suddenly, everything disappeared. No terms. No definitions. No pretty pics. I started laughing. Come on out here Ashton, you can't punk me! When Ashton didn't show it did not surprise me, he never does for the little people. Still, no film crew, no cameras. What the hell? My laughing may have turned to sobs. After a full three minutes of blank screen and crying I begun to pray and a minute later when that didn't work I might have thrown a temper tantrum, kicking and cursing like a 3-year-old with Tourette's.

Then magically the sun shown down and I think I saw some glitter and it was all back.

Obviously Ashton is operating wordpress now and therefore I am moving the park to blogger. Rob and I are super excited about the move, which will take place sometime around the holidays. While I pack and arrange, Rob had graciously agreed to sing for me. The lovely and talented Mrs. Vanquish has been enlisted to design the new layout. She doesn't even seem to mind what a complete idiot I am. Probably because she is brilliant enough for the both of us. Thank fuck.

Now I wish that someone had informed me of the Kutcher situation beforehand and I find that this is true in a lot of instances. I seem to be lacking in the information I need category, yet I am a plethera of useless knowledge. Here are some other things I'd like to have info on in advance.

If you are a drama queen that likes the smell of stirred shit, I'd like to know about that.

If you are the type of person who the cops have on speed dial. Police call twice a week and just go, "wait outside, we're on our way." That seems like something I should know.

If your parents were cousins and now you are your own cousin. I might need to know that.

If everyone in Wal-Mart is going to lose their damn mind and start stampeding for the same item. That would be information I need.

If you are unable to drive under 100 mph and you take corners on two wheels. I want to know.

If you have ever driven your drunk father to your moms parole hearing. Email me, we might be related.

If you are a little bit crazy and your life is pretty much one fuck up after another. Let me know, we should be friends.