Light bulb, light bulb burning bright...

It's official. Today Britain is a darker place to live in . We've known for some time that the Fourth Reich wanted to plunge this country back into darkness - and now they've achieved it!

They banned the 100 watt incandescent lightbulb - I have a secret store, but don't tell anyone - and know they've banned the 60 watt as well. I shall be out later today buying up all the old stock at my local supermarket.

And it seems I'm not alone. The newspapers have been reporting that Britons have been buying up these things like they're going out of fashion! (Oops! They are though aren't they?). Just take a look at the internet and see how many sellers have been stockpiling the bloody things and now hope to make a killing.

So why is this happening? Well, it's all to do with global warming, apparently. This is a subject, you will have gathered, that gets right up my nose. See yesterday's post for example. Well, that's cobblers. It's about control. It's about authoritarianism. It's about killing off democracy.

Nobody much likes these things. They take time to warm up, give off an inferior or often yellowing light, they're expensive and many can't be used with a dimmer switch. I have seven dimmer switches in my house if you count the four bedside ones that are touch sensitive and work on three levels.

But we have to have them because Brussels says so. It really doesn't matter what the people of this country want. It's a glowing example (sorry for the pun!) of this country being told what to do by foreigners. It's the democratic wishes of the people of this country being over-ruled and ignored. It's all that bad about the EU.

And the worse thing is that this government doesn't have the balls to represent it's electorate and just tell Brussels to sod off!...

(There's a nice article in the Telegraph you can read if you want to know more - just click here)

Light bulb, light bulb burning bright...

It's official. Today Britain is a darker place to live in . We've known for some time that the Fourth Reich wanted to plunge this country back into darkness - and now they've achieved it!

They banned the 100 watt incandescent lightbulb - I have a secret store, but don't tell anyone - and know they've banned the 60 watt as well. I shall be out later today buying up all the old stock at my local supermarket.

And it seems I'm not alone. The newspapers have been reporting that Britons have been buying up these things like they're going out of fashion! (Oops! They are though aren't they?). Just take a look at the internet and see how many sellers have been stockpiling the bloody things and now hope to make a killing.

So why is this happening? Well, it's all to do with global warming, apparently. This is a subject, you will have gathered, that gets right up my nose. See yesterday's post for example. Well, that's cobblers. It's about control. It's about authoritarianism. It's about killing off democracy.

Nobody much likes these things. They take time to warm up, give off an inferior or often yellowing light, they're expensive and many can't be used with a dimmer switch. I have seven dimmer switches in my house if you count the four bedside ones that are touch sensitive and work on three levels.

But we have to have them because Brussels says so. It really doesn't matter what the people of this country want. It's a glowing example (sorry for the pun!) of this country being told what to do by foreigners. It's the democratic wishes of the people of this country being over-ruled and ignored. It's all that bad about the EU.

And the worse thing is that this government doesn't have the balls to represent it's electorate and just tell Brussels to sod off!...

(There's a nice article in the Telegraph you can read if you want to know more - just click here)

Rowing to the North Pole

Now here's a headline from the Daily Mail that got my goat the other day :

"British explorers become first to row to North Pole... after global warming melts ice caps"

Well, sorry guys, but whilst not wishing to belittle what is, after all, quite a big physical achievement this is, well, bollocks isn't it?

As my regular reader will know, I have just spent a couple of weeks up there. What might be a little less well known is that our vessel's expedition crew know a thing or two about the polar ice cap and have the academic qualifications to back it up.

They refuse to use the expression 'global warming' because they feel that the expression 'climate change' is more appropriate and climate change is cyclical and natural. They also point out that there are bad years and good years up there and that there is little or no evidence that the retreat in the ice shelf that has happened this year is in any way unusual. In fact, whilst it is true it retreated a fair way this summer, the ice seems to be reforming earlier than usual. To put it another way - swings and roundabouts...

But what really concerns them up there is not warming, but pollution. In particular, there seems to be evidence that the emissions from the emerging Chinese industrial revolution is pumping pollutants into the arctic atmosphere and this is finding its way into the human and animal food chain. This is a lot more worrying that the ice 'melting' - things are being poisoned.

But back to that offending headline :

What the Mail seems to be missing in it's scramble for a feelgood headline is that these guys rowed to the MAGNETIC north pole which, as it happens, is nowhere near the GEOGRAPHIC north pole. We got within 600 miles of that other one and, believe me, there was no way you were going to get there in a rowing boat - as you can see from the picture I took when one of our zodiacs got stuck after we went 'ashore' for a walkabout...

Oh yeah - and I almost forgot. The magnetic pole has shifted since 1996 and these guys rowed to where it was then, which means they missed today's location by about 738 kilometers!

Rowing to the North Pole

Now here's a headline from the Daily Mail that got my goat the other day :

"British explorers become first to row to North Pole... after global warming melts ice caps"

Well, sorry guys, but whilst not wishing to belittle what is, after all, quite a big physical achievement this is, well, bollocks isn't it?

As my regular reader will know, I have just spent a couple of weeks up there. What might be a little less well known is that our vessel's expedition crew know a thing or two about the polar ice cap and have the academic qualifications to back it up.

They refuse to use the expression 'global warming' because they feel that the expression 'climate change' is more appropriate and climate change is cyclical and natural. They also point out that there are bad years and good years up there and that there is little or no evidence that the retreat in the ice shelf that has happened this year is in any way unusual. In fact, whilst it is true it retreated a fair way this summer, the ice seems to be reforming earlier than usual. To put it another way - swings and roundabouts...

But what really concerns them up there is not warming, but pollution. In particular, there seems to be evidence that the emissions from the emerging Chinese industrial revolution is pumping pollutants into the arctic atmosphere and this is finding its way into the human and animal food chain. This is a lot more worrying that the ice 'melting' - things are being poisoned.

But back to that offending headline :

What the Mail seems to be missing in it's scramble for a feelgood headline is that these guys rowed to the MAGNETIC north pole which, as it happens, is nowhere near the GEOGRAPHIC north pole. We got within 600 miles of that other one and, believe me, there was no way you were going to get there in a rowing boat - as you can see from the picture I took when one of our zodiacs got stuck after we went 'ashore' for a walkabout...

Oh yeah - and I almost forgot. The magnetic pole has shifted since 1996 and these guys rowed to where it was then, which means they missed today's location by about 738 kilometers!

An absence of technology

My arse is duly frozen, but I have made it back in one piece from the frozen wastes of Spitzbergen.

It was a humbling experience in many ways; a tribute to the human spirit encapsulated in amazing tales of survival against all odds, a testament to human stupidity and vanity as captured by the most amazing attempts to be the first to reach the north pole, and an eyeopener as to how human greed can destroy everything it touches. It has literally touched my life, if that doesn't sound too pretentious?

But the most interesting thing that I noticed was the way in which the modern human - especially the men - react when you take away their toys...

Many could not bear to be parted from their technological crutches, using their iPhones to take pictures even though they had excellent cameras around their necks. iPads were being used for playing games in the boring moments. Texts were being written just so they could be queued up and sent when 'civilisation' returned.

The picture above is a modern hut in use by a bunch of Polish scientists at Hyttavika in Eastern Svalbard. They have just spend several weeks there studying geology in the area. The inside is remarkable in that whilst it is amazingly cozy, there are absolutely no home comforts to speak of and it is staggeringly compact. And this is a modern hut, so just think what it was like 200 years ago trying to survive the Arctic winter. This is modern technology up here!

I spent ten days in the high arctic. As I write this I have absolutely no idea whatsoever what has been going on in the outside world. There is no internet connection, no mobile phone signal and we did not see another ship or living sole for 6 days on the trot. Up here you are on your own and you are totally cut off.

This focuses the mind. It makes you realize what is really important. You do not want to break an ankle here, or get attacked by a bear, or squashed by a walrus - they're aggressive buggers! - or get charged by a reindeer.

And I am not exaggerating. We had armed guards with high powered rifles watching for bears. One day, we encountered 5...

In many ways, I was sorry when we had to leave, but what really made me laugh was the sigh of relief on the faces of many of my fellow passengers when the phones came back on! They just couldn't wait to text and phone people for no apparent reason other than to reassure themselves that their comfort blankets were once again working.

When I read the stories of the intrepid - if somewhat foolhardy - arctic explorers it does indeed make me reflect on just how hooked we have become on things that, at the end of the day, are really quite irrelevant...

An absence of technology

My arse is duly frozen, but I have made it back in one piece from the frozen wastes of Spitzbergen.

It was a humbling experience in many ways; a tribute to the human spirit encapsulated in amazing tales of survival against all odds, a testament to human stupidity and vanity as captured by the most amazing attempts to be the first to reach the north pole, and an eyeopener as to how human greed can destroy everything it touches. It has literally touched my life, if that doesn't sound too pretentious?

But the most interesting thing that I noticed was the way in which the modern human - especially the men - react when you take away their toys...

Many could not bear to be parted from their technological crutches, using their iPhones to take pictures even though they had excellent cameras around their necks. iPads were being used for playing games in the boring moments. Texts were being written just so they could be queued up and sent when 'civilisation' returned.

The picture above is a modern hut in use by a bunch of Polish scientists at Hyttavika in Eastern Svalbard. They have just spend several weeks there studying geology in the area. The inside is remarkable in that whilst it is amazingly cozy, there are absolutely no home comforts to speak of and it is staggeringly compact. And this is a modern hut, so just think what it was like 200 years ago trying to survive the Arctic winter. This is modern technology up here!

I spent ten days in the high arctic. As I write this I have absolutely no idea whatsoever what has been going on in the outside world. There is no internet connection, no mobile phone signal and we did not see another ship or living sole for 6 days on the trot. Up here you are on your own and you are totally cut off.

This focuses the mind. It makes you realize what is really important. You do not want to break an ankle here, or get attacked by a bear, or squashed by a walrus - they're aggressive buggers! - or get charged by a reindeer.

And I am not exaggerating. We had armed guards with high powered rifles watching for bears. One day, we encountered 5...

In many ways, I was sorry when we had to leave, but what really made me laugh was the sigh of relief on the faces of many of my fellow passengers when the phones came back on! They just couldn't wait to text and phone people for no apparent reason other than to reassure themselves that their comfort blankets were once again working.

When I read the stories of the intrepid - if somewhat foolhardy - arctic explorers it does indeed make me reflect on just how hooked we have become on things that, at the end of the day, are really quite irrelevant...

The ecoRape of Norfolk

Once there was a time when you talked about rape in Norfolk and the image of vast fields of yellow crops blowing in the wind came to mind. But not any more...

I have just spent a few days in north Norfolk. I thought it would be nice to get away and experience the peace and tranquility of the countryside; to take in the panoramic views; to escape from technology to a slower pace of life.

Wrong!

There is a new kind of rape now in north Norfolk - ecoRape. You can't move in Norfolk without falling over bloody wind turbines. They're everywhere. Even the wheat fields have these festering carbuncles of failed technology growing in their midst.

And if you are foolish enough to go to the coast for a nice bit of Cromer crab or perhaps a stroll along the front at Sheringham, then there are even more of them! They have mounted telescopes along the promenade so you can watch the damn things being erected. In Sheringham, they have put up a shiny new exhibition centre for you to visit. Yes, the propaganda machine is in full swing in Norfolk.

Chris Huhne - you remember him? The bloke that's just been referred to the CPS for being a lying git? - says that we are 'blessed' in this country with 'more than our fair share of offshore wind'. I suspect that if we could harness the hot air he's giving off, we could do without the turbines? Well, he reckons that this technology is the saviour of our energy requirements and, of course, it's all amazingly green.

In the cottage we were staying at, there is a wind turbine in the front garden. The owner reckons that it is going to take him 20 years to recoup the outlay. By this time of course it will have worn out and most likely need replacing, but never mind. And naturally that pay back period assumes that the current level of subsidy for the electricity he sells back to the grid continues - which I sincerely doubt.

If you know anything about electricity, then you will know that AC current cannot be stored. It is simply generated and if not used then it is wasted. So if wind power is not consistently available, then the conventional generators have to take up the slack. And don't forget that you can't turn a nuclear, coal or gas powered power station on and off at the flick if a switch. You can only do that with hydro.

So the simple facts are that when the wind is blowing, you can back off the only other source of clean energy currently available - water. So are we saving the planet? No, I don't think so.

And they certainly fuck up the landscape...

The ecoRape of Norfolk

Once there was a time when you talked about rape in Norfolk and the image of vast fields of yellow crops blowing in the wind came to mind. But not any more...

I have just spent a few days in north Norfolk. I thought it would be nice to get away and experience the peace and tranquility of the countryside; to take in the panoramic views; to escape from technology to a slower pace of life.

Wrong!

There is a new kind of rape now in north Norfolk - ecoRape. You can't move in Norfolk without falling over bloody wind turbines. They're everywhere. Even the wheat fields have these festering carbuncles of failed technology growing in their midst.

And if you are foolish enough to go to the coast for a nice bit of Cromer crab or perhaps a stroll along the front at Sheringham, then there are even more of them! They have mounted telescopes along the promenade so you can watch the damn things being erected. In Sheringham, they have put up a shiny new exhibition centre for you to visit. Yes, the propaganda machine is in full swing in Norfolk.

Chris Huhne - you remember him? The bloke that's just been referred to the CPS for being a lying git? - says that we are 'blessed' in this country with 'more than our fair share of offshore wind'. I suspect that if we could harness the hot air he's giving off, we could do without the turbines? Well, he reckons that this technology is the saviour of our energy requirements and, of course, it's all amazingly green.

In the cottage we were staying at, there is a wind turbine in the front garden. The owner reckons that it is going to take him 20 years to recoup the outlay. By this time of course it will have worn out and most likely need replacing, but never mind. And naturally that pay back period assumes that the current level of subsidy for the electricity he sells back to the grid continues - which I sincerely doubt.

If you know anything about electricity, then you will know that AC current cannot be stored. It is simply generated and if not used then it is wasted. So if wind power is not consistently available, then the conventional generators have to take up the slack. And don't forget that you can't turn a nuclear, coal or gas powered power station on and off at the flick if a switch. You can only do that with hydro.

So the simple facts are that when the wind is blowing, you can back off the only other source of clean energy currently available - water. So are we saving the planet? No, I don't think so.

And they certainly fuck up the landscape...

ecoCrap

I have long suspected that Chris Huhne was a twat, but now he's gone and opened his mouth and proved it!

Huhne has announced that this country will dramatically speed up it's carbon reduction measures and will halve greenhouse gases by 2025, ultimately cutting our emissions by 60% by 2030.

Well, Chris, this is bollocks, isn't it? Even members of your own party don't agree with you. Vince Cable has warned that your unachievable plans will damage business and make us uncompetitive. But Huhne isn't listening. He says that Britain is leading the way and showing the world how things should be done!

Trouble is, that the world isn't watching. The UK is no longer a world power and it's time we woke up to the fact that no-one out there gives a shit what we are doing any more.

The Employers Federation says these measures will drive businesses abroad. Analysts say we will have to produce 97% of our electricity from non carbon sources. It's simply not achievable. Even if it were, then in the great scheme of things, it would make no difference.

To put all this in perspective, whilst we are agonising over whether to build another runway at Heathrow, the Chinese are building SEVENTY new international airports.

It's all a load of old ecoCrap...

ecoCrap

I have long suspected that Chris Huhne was a twat, but now he's gone and opened his mouth and proved it!

Huhne has announced that this country will dramatically speed up it's carbon reduction measures and will halve greenhouse gases by 2025, ultimately cutting our emissions by 60% by 2030.

Well, Chris, this is bollocks, isn't it? Even members of your own party don't agree with you. Vince Cable has warned that your unachievable plans will damage business and make us uncompetitive. But Huhne isn't listening. He says that Britain is leading the way and showing the world how things should be done!

Trouble is, that the world isn't watching. The UK is no longer a world power and it's time we woke up to the fact that no-one out there gives a shit what we are doing any more.

The Employers Federation says these measures will drive businesses abroad. Analysts say we will have to produce 97% of our electricity from non carbon sources. It's simply not achievable. Even if it were, then in the great scheme of things, it would make no difference.

To put all this in perspective, whilst we are agonising over whether to build another runway at Heathrow, the Chinese are building SEVENTY new international airports.

It's all a load of old ecoCrap...

Green tax

No doubt about it..... Chris Huhne is definitely off his rocker!

The latest blockbuster from this totally out-of-touch-with-reality fuckwit is that we should increase Council Tax bills for people who don't insulate their homes.

The Lib Dem minister said he expected councils to favour households who made their properties more energy efficient.

He told MPs on the environmental audit committee that councils could help reduce carbon emissions by subsidising green households at the expense of those who don’t insulate lofts or install double glazing.

Now you might well think that this is complete ecoCrap pie in the sky. And you'd be right.

Exactly how are councils expected to implement this ridiculous idea? Even if it was practical, in a time of economic austerity, it would cost millions more to assess and collect than the revenue it would generate...

None of this, of course, occurs to Huhne because he's just here to save the planet.

Thankfully, Eric Pickles dismissed the idea by pointing out that people were fed up with Council Tax rises and had no appetite for any more.

I think that's a polite way of telling him to bugger off...

Green tax

No doubt about it..... Chris Huhne is definitely off his rocker!

The latest blockbuster from this totally out-of-touch-with-reality fuckwit is that we should increase Council Tax bills for people who don't insulate their homes.

The Lib Dem minister said he expected councils to favour households who made their properties more energy efficient.

He told MPs on the environmental audit committee that councils could help reduce carbon emissions by subsidising green households at the expense of those who don’t insulate lofts or install double glazing.

Now you might well think that this is complete ecoCrap pie in the sky. And you'd be right.

Exactly how are councils expected to implement this ridiculous idea? Even if it was practical, in a time of economic austerity, it would cost millions more to assess and collect than the revenue it would generate...

None of this, of course, occurs to Huhne because he's just here to save the planet.

Thankfully, Eric Pickles dismissed the idea by pointing out that people were fed up with Council Tax rises and had no appetite for any more.

I think that's a polite way of telling him to bugger off...

International Climate Week

Did you know that this week was International Climate Week? No.? Well, until I saw it on the BBC breakfast programme yesterday morning, nor did I.

Apparently, Monday 21 March 2011, marked the start of the UK’s first ever Climate Week. It is a new national occasion, backed by the Prime Minister, has-been eco knobhead Al Gore and celebrities such as Paul McCartney, as well as "a huge number of people and organisations from every part of society".

Climate Week apparently provides an opportunity to raise awareness and highlight and inspire innovative ideas which will help protect our planet and the people who live on it. As far as I can see it has failed spectacularly!

Basically, it's a bit of touchy feely bullshit thought up by the Department for International Development. You can read about it by clicking here. I especially like the flash at the head of the site where it thanks 'British Taxpayers' which I found particularly offensive. No bugger asked me if they could give my money away at a time when I need it myself.

Apparently this amazingly inconspicuous set of events is sponsored by Tesco, Kelloggs, French energy supplier EDF (Hmmmm...is this appropriate?) and RBS which you will remember is also funded by the taxpayer. Still, it did get an award for "Best Initiative for a Government or Statutory body (see here) as did HM Revenue and Customs for "making environmental targets a departmental priority.

I am tempted to say that collecting tax from loads of people who haven't paid up might be a better priority for HMRC because, after all, they haven't contributed to this piece of pathetic self aggrandisement - it's just us mugs...

International Climate Week

Did you know that this week was International Climate Week? No.? Well, until I saw it on the BBC breakfast programme yesterday morning, nor did I.

Apparently, Monday 21 March 2011, marked the start of the UK’s first ever Climate Week. It is a new national occasion, backed by the Prime Minister, has-been eco knobhead Al Gore and celebrities such as Paul McCartney, as well as "a huge number of people and organisations from every part of society".

Climate Week apparently provides an opportunity to raise awareness and highlight and inspire innovative ideas which will help protect our planet and the people who live on it. As far as I can see it has failed spectacularly!

Basically, it's a bit of touchy feely bullshit thought up by the Department for International Development. You can read about it by clicking here. I especially like the flash at the head of the site where it thanks 'British Taxpayers' which I found particularly offensive. No bugger asked me if they could give my money away at a time when I need it myself.

Apparently this amazingly inconspicuous set of events is sponsored by Tesco, Kelloggs, French energy supplier EDF (Hmmmm...is this appropriate?) and RBS which you will remember is also funded by the taxpayer. Still, it did get an award for "Best Initiative for a Government or Statutory body (see here) as did HM Revenue and Customs for "making environmental targets a departmental priority.

I am tempted to say that collecting tax from loads of people who haven't paid up might be a better priority for HMRC because, after all, they haven't contributed to this piece of pathetic self aggrandisement - it's just us mugs...

Dear National Grid...

Recently on the BBC, I was impressed to listen to a report about a music festival in Scandinavia that was only running on renewable energy.

Apparently, the site was next to a hydro electric plant and the festival was powered by plugging into their equivalent of the National Grid. Now, I thought that by plugging into the Grid for their power, they were taking a mixture of energy sources connected to the grid at that time, not just the one next door.

But the BBC cannot possibly be talking bollocks. It's the BBC.

So please can you arrange for my house to only recieve power from green, renewable energy sources in the future rather than all these sources that pollute the planet. I'm not sure how you do this, but if the BBC says it can be done, then I am sure you know the answer.

Looking forward to being able to push the big green power button,

Yours sincerely,

Ivor Bigbottie,
Green Acres,
Lower Carbon,
NE1 4T.

Dear National Grid...

Recently on the BBC, I was impressed to listen to a report about a music festival in Scandinavia that was only running on renewable energy.

Apparently, the site was next to a hydro electric plant and the festival was powered by plugging into their equivalent of the National Grid. Now, I thought that by plugging into the Grid for their power, they were taking a mixture of energy sources connected to the grid at that time, not just the one next door.

But the BBC cannot possibly be talking bollocks. It's the BBC.

So please can you arrange for my house to only recieve power from green, renewable energy sources in the future rather than all these sources that pollute the planet. I'm not sure how you do this, but if the BBC says it can be done, then I am sure you know the answer.

Looking forward to being able to push the big green power button,

Yours sincerely,

Ivor Bigbottie,
Green Acres,
Lower Carbon,
NE1 4T.

A song for global warming day

Today is 10:10:10 and is being marked by a day of action to force people to make a commitment to reduce their emissions by 10%.

I use the word 'force' advisedly due to a recent appalling bad taste 'mini-movie' - that's a propaganda video to you and me - which shows people being blown up if they don't agree with the eco-loonies at 10:10UK.

Anyway, here is an original song by me which I am submitting as my contribution to 10:10:10 day :

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Incidentally, the biggest contribution to greenhouse gasses is the carbon dioxide produced by people when they breathe out, so if we could get some of these prats to stop breathing...

A song for global warming day

Today is 10:10:10 and is being marked by a day of action to force people to make a commitment to reduce their emissions by 10%.

I use the word 'force' advisedly due to a recent appalling bad taste 'mini-movie' - that's a propaganda video to you and me - which shows people being blown up if they don't agree with the eco-loonies at 10:10UK.

Anyway, here is an original song by me which I am submitting as my contribution to 10:10:10 day :

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Incidentally, the biggest contribution to greenhouse gasses is the carbon dioxide produced by people when they breathe out, so if we could get some of these prats to stop breathing...

1010 new TV advertisement

Those PR geniuses at 1010 have just released a new 20 second TV advertisement. See what you think...

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1010 new TV advertisement

Those PR geniuses at 1010 have just released a new 20 second TV advertisement. See what you think...

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