Obama and Cameron have 'frank' discussion

Obama - hanging on the telephone...

US President,Barack Obama, has had a 'frank but friendly' discussion with Prime Minister, David Cameron.

This blog has received an exclusive transcript of their conversation :

Pres : "Hi, Dave. BO here. How's it hanging, ol' buddy?"

PM : "Great. And can I just say right away how much I really appreciate your troops not shooting me while I was in Afghanistan the other day."

Pres : "Don't sweat it, Dave. You just have to remember not to stand in front of our guys and you'll be just fine!"

PM : "This line is secure, right?" (There is a sound of sniggering in the background)

Pres : "Absolutely, Dave. We can say anything we want and not even MI5 or the CIA will know anything about it. Say, can we talk about this oil thing with British Petroleum. It's kinda giving me a hard time here..."

PM : "Well, I can see that would be difficult - but you know I have had strong words with Tony Hayward and he tells me that the oil's not hemorrhaging half as fast BPs share price."

Pres : "That guy couldn't plug a hole in his own ass, least of all a Gulf oil spill! Guess you know we're gonna insist on you guys paying for all this shit."

PM : "That could be a problem. You see we're flat broke over here at the moment. Perhaps we could pay you in some other way?"

Pres : "As long as you're not gonna suggest oil. We've got rather too much of that over here at the moment"

PM : "No, actually I was going to suggest double or quits on the football on Saturday. If we win, you pick up the tab. If you win, we'll let you have BP!"

Pres : "You're on, Dave. We'll whoop you assholes good!"

At this point, there is a twenty minute argument about the relative merits of soccer and basketball after which the President hangs up. Cameron is heard to remark "I think that went rather well, don't you?"