Brown to head new Political Party

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Breaking news is that Gordon Brown is to return to front line politics as head of a new political party.

The new party is to be called the "Coalition of Unions, Nationalists and Tree-huggers." C.U.N.T. is to be formed by disaffected Trades Union funded MPs who have lost faith in the New Labour ideal together with members of the four UK Nationalist Parties and supporters of the eco-lobby.
Emerging from his hiding place in his Scottish constituency, Mr Brown explained what he has been up to whilst out of the public eye :

"I have been persuaded by my fellow CUNTs that at this time of great difficulty, the country needs a new political direction and a strong leader - namely me."

"This new party draws from the great Trades Unions movement that stands for the rights of the working classes everywhere. It gives voice to the Nationalists amongst us and strenghtens the all important green voice."

"None of the other parties encompass all these things. We want to be inclusive."

"We believe that we have a real chance of gaining seats in the next European Elections due to the fairness of the proportional voting system that I have always fought for. We have already recieved strong support from the European Parliament where we have been welcomed by the many CUNTs who already sit there."

The acting leader of the Labour Party, Harriet Harman, welcomed the move, saying "It will be common knowledge that I have always supported getting more CUNTs onto the front benches."

Prime Minister, David Cameron, commented "This new party is clearly the natural home for Gordon and I wish him well."