Please reverse my meal !

Am I being unreasonable? - answers on a postcard, please...

I paid six grand for a cruise on what is described as a 5 star boat, so I think that I am entitled to at least a reasonable standard of cuisine!

To illustrate the problem, after a meal the previous night which comprised a chicken salad, followed by chicken soup followed by chicken and chips, one of my fellow passengers was heard to ask "What kind of chicken are we having tonight?"

To add to the problem, I am reminded of a very dry humoured fellow that I met on a boat half way up the Brahmaputra in India. "Excuse me", he politely enquired of the waiter, "but could you please reverse my meal?" The waiter was rather confused and asked him what he meant. My friend replied "Well, I'd rather like the food hot and the beer cold, not the other way around."

I tried this approach last night but have to confess that the waiter looked at me rather blankly. I suspect the joke was lost in translation!

However, I think I am beginning to get the gist of what the problem is here. The Greek manager on this boat doesn't speak Turkish - which is rather unfortunate because the Turkish crew don't speak Greek. So to make everything work they speak to each other in English.

Unfortunately, I have to confirm that the crew don't speak English either...