Many thanks for your last letter which has cheered me up no end. Dave has been a right old grump since he came back from a meeting with that dreadful Merkel woman. 'Old Murkey' we call her - always the prophet of doom and gloom, always trying to screw more money out of us. When is she going to get the message that we just haven't got any, I wonder?
I had lunch the other day with Sarah Brown. I have to say she looked completely out of place in the Cafe Royal, but then they'll let anyone in there these days. Standards have just dropped so low...
There was lots of baby talk before she eventually got to the point. She seems to think that if we can wangle Gordon a job in the EU Finance Ministry then he reckons he could sort out all this nasty Euro business that's been going on. I didn't like to say so, but wasn't it his fault that the country went broke in the first place? As far as I can see, the EU lot seem to being doing all right on that front by themselves without any more help from Gordon.
Still, I have to say that that Nick Clegg is a really lovely bloke. Dave says he's always willing to take his share of the flack when things go pear shaped. Can't say I take to his wife though. She's alright, but she's Spanish you know - so she keeps banging on about how Spain could be the next country to go down the pan. Seems to be trying to help them by getting through the Rioja though, if you catch my drift?
Nick used to be an MEP, so Dave has to be just SO careful in what he says about 'The Fourth Reich' as he calls it in case Nick gets upset. We need his votes to stay at number ten otherwise I'm going to have to running up the bills in the Harrods' soft furnishing department again. The drapes here were just so GHASTLY that we simply had to change them. That last bloke had such awful taste. And they cost a packet, so jolly good job the tax payer's picking up the bill, yah?
Anyway, must close now as Florrie's yelling. I know I said I'd do anything to help Dave get the job and she's such a little poppet, but at times like this I really wonder if it was worth it! And now that dreadful Miliband person's gone and jumped on the bandwagon and had one of his own. Politicians, eh! Who'd have 'em?
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