Japanese attitudes

For a number of years, I worked for a Japanese company. I have visitted Japan and found it a beautiful country. I admire the way in which they have dealt with the recent disaster which has hit their country. I admit that I don't like the Japanese in general, though I have met one or two notable exceptions.

But there is one consistent thread through all this - I will never understand them.

Many years ago, I had a Japanese teacher staying with me and she and her colleagues gave us a little thank you party one evening at the end of their stay. They were demonstrating calligraphy and asked what they could write on a little sign for me as a keepsake. I asked her to write "Go away. I'm busy" so I could hang it behind my desk at work.

The sign duly hung, but always got a strange reception whenever it was read. Several years later, I asked an Englishman who lived in Japan why this was. He told me that it did not translate. In Japan every is busy working as hard as he can, so what was my point?

On another occasion, I shared an office with a chap called Henry (they all took English names when working here). Henry ran QA for the UK and reported to a Euro QA manager based in collogne called Bando. One day the phone rang. Henry was slumped over his desk looking despondent. Bando was on the phone so Henry immediately sprang to attention! For the next five minutes, all he said was "Hi, Bando san. Hi!"

As he put the phone down he slumped across his desk breathing a sigh of relief. "Bando san?" I asked. "Hi," he replied. "Bando san."

I asked him "Henry, if Bando san told you to go up to the roof and throw yourself off, would you do it?" Henry looked at me and replied "Of course." I looked at him in amazement and said "Would you ask why?" He said "Not ask me to do that unless he have good reason."

After a few seconds he asked me "What you say if Phil san ask you do this? "I'd tell him to fuck off!" I answered.

Neither of ever figured the other out...