No uprising here!

Sorry, but at the risk of going against the flow here and whilst at the same time expressing admiration for the artistry of Max Farquar's excellent uprising video, you need to get a grip on reality.

It ain't going to happen!

And I am going to tell you why...

The average Brit basically doesn't give a flying fuck. You can yell at him all you like, he'll just shrug and say "whatever" then he'll go down the pub for a good moan and a few beers with his mates. Or he'll go home, slob out in front of the tellie, sink a few beers and moan at his girlfriend.

Put up his taxes, he'll have a good whinge. Petrol at £1.50 a litre, short petrol protest maybe, then business as usual. Expenses scandal, good moan about MPs being a bunch of crooks. General election - can't be bothered to vote because they're all the same. Immigration? Bloody disgrace but so what! Europe? Crap but we're in now...

Let's face it - this ain't Tunis or Cairo. This is London, the whingeing capital of the world. Whatever happens here we just sit on our arses and moan, then forget all about it! About the only bloody thing that gets us worked up is the weather - the one thing we can actually do sod all about.

The only uprising there will be in this country is the one being planned by Milipede's union masters to bring down the government. And what will we do about the summer of discontent? Have a bloody good moan and then just get on with life.

If the world ever ends, the only thing the British will be worrying about is the effect it has on the football programme.

Britain is fucked - but who cares? Nobody!